Since the dawn of time, certain questions have preoccupied the human mind. Why are we here? What is a good life? Why are we so drawn to the sight of two idiots fighting?
With over a million Twitter followers, a habit of being willfully divisive and a total inability to take criticism, it was only a matter of time before a person emerged from the crowd to seriously wind Ian Poulter up. That that person should be English football’s own answer to Ian Poulter was just too good to be true!
Robbie Savage was (and still is) something of a football legend. Adored by small pockets of fans across Britain, but nearly universally loathed by everyone else (here’s his welcome at a darts competition a couple of years ago!), he’s the kind of loud-mouthed, long-haired defensive midfielder who’d be kicking your shins one moment and screaming to the referee about injustice the next. He can also be massively entertaining, as his fledgling career as a pundit has proven.
When Poulter tweeted this photo of his new Magnanni slip-ons (“I love them 6 pairs and growing fast”), the footballer, knowing an easy mark when he saw one, just couldn’t resist. His reply was the opening salvo in an epic Twitter war that would last hours.
Hapless Poults soon found himself on the receiving end of a barrage of photo messages (“now this is embarrassing have you heard of weights”, “game over”) and insults like “how many majors you won…. errrr.. None… Oh and never will and you’d [sic] gears shite.” In his defence, he put up a decent fight, finding some pictures that poked fun at Savage’s chav status (chavs explained), his hilarious (and very real) tattoo of the Armani logo and the fact that he resembles a dog. In the end, though, he was just overpowered, with Savage proving slightly more adept at “I know you are but what am I” (years of Premiership football will really improve your trash-talking).
Bizarrely, Rory McIlroy and DJ Spoony were sucked into the argument, their walk-on cameos adding more weirdness to an encounter that had already hit the upper atmosphere of planet Random.
Now that the dust’s settled, it seems that Poults and Savage have made up, each being not quite so egomaniacal as to fail to see their likeness in the other. Thoroughly pleased with himself, Savage drew a line under the exchange: “I’m surprised you knew who I was! Lol I hops you do win a major by the way I honestly do !”
The whole thing was pretty accurately summed up by football pundit Chris Kamara, who tweeted soon afterwards [sic]: “people forget sav only doing it for the response, cant believe poults line & sinker.”