A Medley of Tiger’s Latest Hits
By Stephanie Wei under General

If you think you’re having a bad week, take a moment and look at Tiger’s. (Then again, most of us aren’t billionaires.)

On Thursday The National Enquirer reported that Tiger Woods had 121 affairs while married to Elin Nordegren.

While in therapy, he confessed to sleeping with 120 women, but left one off the list — a one-night stand with Raychel Coudriet, the 21-year-old daughter of a neighbor, which reportedly was the last straw for Elin. Via the NY Daily News:

“This is the worst betrayal ever!” she screamed over the phone as Woods dined with pals after making his golf comeback at the Masters tournament earlier this month.

“That’s it … I’m divorcing you.”

The Enquirer’s tipster told the tab “she was screaming so loudly that everyone at the table could hear.”

“Tiger tried to deny it,” the source said. “But Elin yelled at him, ‘You’re lying! You’re always a liar! You’re a piece of [expletive]!”

Um, I’d think it was over before she found out he lied about the last one. I’m really just impressed he was able to keep track. I mean, once you hit the double-digits, who’s really counting, anyway? Did he have a little black book where he tallied up his trysts? And it’s morbidly impressive he was able to win all those golf tournaments in between boinking so many women!

Meanwhile, according to Sports Illustrated’s anonymous players survey, 24% believe Tiger used “HGH or or other performance-enhancing drugs.” One was quoted saying, “I don’t know, but something’s not right.”
There’s also been the first report of fans heckling him since his comeback. Hank Gola of the Daily News reports:

Woods was in the process of missing a five-foot putt for par when two spectators acted in concert: After the first fan first yelled, “Get in the hole!” the second called out, “That’s what she said!”

Charlotte police and course security attempted to track down the hecklers but were unsuccessful as they apparently fled from the green scene.

Oh come on, what is this? A police state? He can handle it! In my opinion, he’s gotten off pretty easy.

As if Tiger’s troubles couldn’t get any worse, he’s about to miss the cut at Quail Hollow. He is nine-over with one hole to play. The last time he failed to see weekend play (on the golf course) at a PGA Tour event was in 2005. Surprisingly, no temper tantrums as far as I’ve seen.

You know what job I’d really like to have right now? The person who gets to interview Tiger after this disastrous round.