David Feherty Is Very, Very Proud to Be an American
By Stephanie Wei under General

Chatting with Dan Patrick on the DP Show on St. Patrick’s Day, CBS funnyman David Feherty pledged his allegiance as an American citizen. He passed the test “so comprehensively, you wouldn’t believe it.” He even knows the name of Thomas Jefferson’s hamster! And don’t call him an “Irish-American” — he’s “just an American and very, very happy.”

Feherty was naturalized as an American on February 25, 2010. So yes, this is a bit of old news. But what’s interesting — as he told Dan Patrick — is he could be the first European Ryder Cup member to serve as an assistant captain to an American Ryder Cup team. And he sure would cherish the honor:

I’m almost certain [American Ryder Cup captain] Corey Pavin will pick me…Monty and I have a little history. I like him very much. It’s just that if I went on fire, he wouldn’t pee on me…I could be like a mole, going from one camp to another and carry vital pieces of information. And talk about trash-talking? Pffftt! That’s what I am. You start with the captain, the largest target.

I’d love to see Feherty chosen for this honor, but it seems baffling. I know Feherty is now an American and his loyalty is to the country (he notes in the pledge of allegiance, there’s a loyalty clause where you have to support everything American), but it would seem — oh, I don’t know — weird for him to root against the Europeans, especially since he represented them in the past.

I know many immigrants who have become American citizens (including my parents), but still cheer for their native country’s teams in sporting championships. This might not be the best analogy, but for what it’s worth, I grew up in Seattle as a huge Sonics (RIP../tear) and Mariners fan (and fairweather Seahawks fan). Now that I’ve been on the east coast for nine years, five of which have been spent in NYC, my utmost loyalty is still with Seattle teams. In other words, I wouldn’t be caught dead ever, ever rooting for the Yankees or the Giants or the Jets or the Knicks.

But I guess Feherty has never been known to be orthodox.

Oh, here’s another example of how seriously he takes his American status. Patrick asked Feherty who he’d help if Colin Montgomerie and Gary McCord were both stranded on the side of the road with flat tires. He quipped, “Hopefully they’re having a discussion and I can run over them both.” But joking aside, he dutifully said, “I’m an American and we come to everyone’s aid.”

And the Americans are lucky to have David Feherty…I think.