The Non-VIP Paparazzi Party at Uchitel Palace
By Stephanie Wei under General

Apparently the paps can’t get enough of alleged original mistress Rachel Uchitel. She just so happens to live around the corner from me (and three blocks down), so I decided to stalk those stalking Rachel, because I, too, have nothing better to do on a Wednesday night and I’m a pathetic creep.

This was the scene outside her apartment around 9:14 p.m.:

Riveting, I know. Just five scraggly bike messenger types with clumsy cameras waiting for Rachel to walk up the stairs, down the stairs, climb in her window, or step out of a black Escalade getting a piggyback ride from Derek Jeter or David Boreanaz or Alex Rodriguez or Michelle Obama or that talking baby from the E*TRADE commercials.

Good luck, guys. At least there’s a fondue restaurant next door and that silver Honda Civic looks like it’ll be a comfy bed.