Tiger Woods Finally Speaks and Says Nothing
By Stephanie Wei under General

Tiger Woods was scheduled to speak with Florida Highway Patrol troopers Sunday afternoon. But shortly after 1:00PM, his attorney Mark NeJame contacted the Florida Highway Patrol to cancel the interview. Again. According to the FHP’s latest statement, they maintain the traffic crash remains under investigation and charges are pending.

Tiger did release a lame, wishy-washy statement on his website:

As you all know, I had a single-car accident earlier this week, and sustained some injuries. I have some cuts, bruising and right now I’m pretty sore.

This situation is my fault, and it’s obviously embarrassing to my family and me. I’m human and I’m not perfect. I will certainly make sure this doesn’t happen again.

This is a private matter and I want to keep it that way. Although I understand there is curiosity, the many false, unfounded and malicious rumors that are currently circulating about my family and me are irresponsible.

The only person responsible for the accident is me. My wife, Elin, acted courageously when she saw I was hurt and in trouble. She was the first person to help me. Any other assertion is absolutely false.

This incident has been stressful and very difficult for Elin, our family and me. I appreciate all the concern and well wishes that we have received. But, I would also ask for some understanding that my family and I deserve some privacy no matter how intrusive some people can be.

And CNBC’s Darren Rovell received this comment from Tiger’s agent, Mark Steinberg:

We have been informed by the Florida Highway Patrol that further discussion with them is both voluntary and optional.

Although Tiger realizes that there is a great deal of public curiosity, it has been conveyed to FHP that he simply has nothing more to add and wishes to protect the privacy of his family.

Satisfied? Now, careless bloggers and gossip websites will stop the nasty rumor-mongering and negligent coverage of the story. Phew!

Update (6:10PM): Tiger hired Mark NeJame, a high-profile criminal defense attorney who is dubbed “Orlando’s Own Johnnie Cochran.” According to the bio on his firm’s website, he has “handled numerous high profile cases involving lawyers, judges, professionals, celebrities, athletes, politicians, law enforcement officials and renowned business people.”