It’s All About Saving Tiger From Embarrassment
By Stephanie Wei under General

There’s been a lot of controversy in the golf world in the past two weeks. Much more than usual. And it’s caused quite the stir because of two words: Tiger Woods. Last week, it was Fartgate and now, it’s Clockgate. Tiger bashed rules official John Paramor on Sunday. (Oh, the nerve!) It was reported the next day that he would be fined for his “harsh” words. Then, at his press conference on Tuesday, he said it was an “erroneous report.”

I smell a conspiracy theory! Behind the PGA’s ironclad doors, what is the real story? We’ll NEVER know because they have to maintain this pristine image. One that is stupidly outdated.

John Feinstein criticizes the Tour’s top-secret policy on fines — and makes a good point. (But I disagree with his view on Paramor’s ruling.)

Here are the possibilities; Commissioner Tim Finchem got cold feet and withdrew the fine. OR: Tiger has not yet received the paperwork from the tour so he was technically correct on Tuesday when he said he hadn’t been fined. I’m inclined to think the former but we just don’t know—and we should know…

But he won’t [change the fine policy] in part because he somehow thinks he’s protecting the “image of the game,” (he told me that once) and because he knows Tiger’s bigger than the game. (He never told me that but we all know it’s true).

Ding, ding, ding! We have a winner, ladies and gentlemen! So what if Tiger receives a $5,000 fine for calling out a rules official? Or slamming clubs? Big whoop. We’re all going to think less of him, that classless, defiant jerk.

If Feinstein’s theory is correct (which is indeed very plausible), then the Tour is putting Tiger above the rules.

What is the “image of the game”? A bunch of stuffy, polo-wearing, middle-aged white men who have their panties in a bunch…and take Cialis. Cool. Well, it is true Tiger is bigger than the game. He has more influence in the world than President Obama. We even care if he farts, which is totally embarrassing. (The Tour had to cover up that one, too — going to ridiculous measures to have the video taken down).

The Tour’s policies need to change to improve the game’s image. And it’s not 1972 anymore.